So I got this book today in a thrift shop, Lost words of love.... I was actually looking for a flower pot. You know, for my plant:
Anyway, I was about to pick up a modestly ugly looking Marymuff.a when I spotted it. Words in our English vocabulary that have become lost through time...BORING? No, not when my sweetheart can say I'm "foading and asks me to unpucker in the the sky parlor." Which, of course, in today's evolved language means, "Hey, I think you're HOT. Let's get loose and go do it in the attic." Okay. Maybe I'm a word geek. But I'll also be able to use the terms dream-hole.b, fatiloquist.c, and and Piss-prophet.d correctly.
So, my next lovelorn letter might sound like:
Dear Millicent Aimcrier,(modern day dr. phil)
my quest monger's.1 flesh spades.2 are always clarity.3. No matter how matter how tactful I try to be, whenever I mention this to him, he works himself into faires.4 and won't listen to me and his murffles.5 flair up. How can I get him to clean up his act and stop being so carked.6?
Thrunched.7,
Hayley
It might sound a little droll, but now I won't have to worry about those West Village New York Clambersculls.8 or Constupration.9
A lot of words have little to do with love, but many of these smoozles.13 were found in 16th and 17th century love letters...and there are plenty of letters, playlets, and poems in the book that would send any modern day lover a runnin' far far away.
But I digress,
Now lets Frik.10 it up!
No fried shirts.11, and gimme a smick.12!
Love,
Mulberry
As always.. I may not have something good to say, but I always have something great to listen to...Good summer jigs for your new vocab lessons in love, and my new adventures on Varick St in NYC.
a. an old keepsake pot or pipe
b an opening in barns, towers, or steeples to let air, light, and sound to pass through
c a fortuneteller
d a person who diagnosed diseases by inspective urine, aka a water caster, see also R Kelly.
1 boyfriend
2 fingernails
3 dirty
4 a lovers fit
5 freckles
6 pissed and weird
7 annoyed
8a very strong ale
9 rape, never fun.
10 Dance to lively music
11 starched button ups
12 kisses :)
13 cuddlies
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